Join us on Instagram @saintbelford for practical self-care tips, empowering reminders and strategies for building habits that stick. Here's a roundup of our self-care tips from the last two weeks:
Be okay with changing your values, beliefs and goals
Your values and beliefs are naturally going to evolve over time and as a result what’s important to you now might change, and that’s okay. Contradictions are normal—it’s inevitable when we’re exposed to new ideas, experiences, cultures, perspectives and people.
What we’re exposed to is going to affect how we view the world and it’s going to influence what we define as important.
You’re allowed to change your mind. You’re allowed to change your opinion. You’re allowed to change direction. There’s no need to hold onto something that doesn’t feel right or true to you anymore.
Put in your non-negotiables first when planning out your week
Figure out what your priorities are—your most important tasks/commitments—and schedule those things first. Let everything else work around your priorities instead of trying to “make time” for your priorities during the week.
That is how you keep yourself at the top of your to-do list. It’s not about “finding” the time. It’s about scheduling time for what matters most to you. This will also make it easier for you to say no to tasks/commitments that pop up during the week because the time slot that might have been vacant has already been allocated to what you have deemed as important.
Create a time buffer for your commitments
Create a time buffer for your events, classes and appointments so you can arrive feeling a little more relaxed and calm as opposed to feeling frazzled.
There have been countless occasions where I’ve arrived to a class or event completely out of breath (from sprinting) and it just doesn’t serve me, so this is something I’ve chosen to work on this year.
If you can resonate, I highly recommend creating a time buffer. If it takes you 20 minutes to get from A to B, give yourself an extra 10 minutes to get there. It could eliminate a lot of the daily stress that comes from rushing.
Be mindful of the words you consistently use to describe yourself
Be mindful of the language you use when you’re describing yourself to others and when you’re talking to yourself because it reinforces your self-image and identity which can impact the habits, behaviour, routine and rituals that you subscribe to.
I was listening to Melissa Ambrossini’s podcast interview with Lorraine Murphy and she was talking about how words have energy and they generate different associations and different feelings with us which can affect our reality.
For example, if you’re always describing yourself as busy, you’re reinforcing that identity of a busy person who is always on the go. You’re also reinforcing those feelings of overwhelm and not being in control. As a result, you might experience resistance when it comes to slowing down or taking time out because it goes against your self-image. It contradicts the identity you’ve created and reinforced as being that “always busy” person.
Acknowledge everything that you got done this week
Acknowledge everything you achieved this week, including all the ticks on your habit tracker and all the positive choices you made for yourself.
We can be so hard on ourselves at times and focus exclusively on the things we haven’t done instead of giving ourselves full credit for the things we managed to get done, so let this be a reminder to shift the spotlight and applaud your efforts.
Do more things just for the fun of it
What’s your idea of fun? Do more of that. Incorporate more “play” into your week and embrace your inner child.
Do one thing you’ve been putting off lately
What have you been putting off lately? What’s something you’ve said you’ve wanted to do but haven’t put any plans into motion? The purpose of this is not to make you feel guilty for not doing that thing. The purpose is to check in with your intentions, however big or small and ask yourself if it’s still important.
Maybe it isn’t and that’s okay, but if it is, you owe it to yourself to honour those intentions. Schedule time for it. Schedule it into your week. Subtract from your schedule to make time for this commitment if it’s truly important to you.
Ask for help when you need it
This could be simply asking for help at work to solve a problem or it could be a little more serious like sitting down with your best friend and asking them to provide some perspective because you’re struggling.
There is no shame in asking for help. Don’t let your pride get in the way. You’re not expected to shoulder the weight of everything. We all need it at some point in our lives. Don’t assume that people know exactly what you need. Only you will know deep down what you need and it’s your responsibility to honour that.
Asking for help also gives other people permission to ask for help, so be the example and reach out when you need it.
Use mantras to interrupt your negative state
Use mantras, simple words or phrases to interrupt your inner dialogue and pull you out of a negative headspace.
One I often use is “trust yourself”—I’ll repeat it whenever I’m experiencing moments of crippling doubt. It pulls me out of that negative headspace and reinforces what I already know. It reminds me of my intentions and how I want to show up in the world. It guides me back to where I want to be.
Think about what mantras, words or phrases you can use to interrupt your negative state and switch your perspective.
Let go of the things you can’t control
Focus your energy on the things you can control. This is a lesson I keep re-learning and I’m sure many of you can relate too.
We can’t control what other people say or do to us but we can (with a lot of practice) control how we show up. We can control how we respond. We can rise above the triggers.
Focusing on your response instead of focusing on how other people “should” act/respond isn’t always easy, but it’s the path that leads to growth and inner peace. Focusing on the latter is simply a waste of energy—we need to keep reminding ourselves of this fact.